Given the country’s geographical location, Turkish culture is a blend of Asia and Europe. It’s a country that’s neither too conservative nor too modern, but moderate in-between.
You may be wondering how this influences Turkish dating culture. Although the country’s dating culture is becoming more and more Western-like, traditional influences are still apparent.
So, if you want to go by the book when dating a Turkish person, keep reading, as you’ll learn all you must know about Turkish dating culture in this blog post!
Turkish Dating Culture
In traditional Turkish culture, romantic relationships are essentially based on the idea of the man chasing after the woman. Turkish women aren’t easy to get, and they like to be chased. Turkish men, on the other hand, do their best to be with the woman they love. However, things aren’t the same for everyone, and modern times and foreign influences have brought some changes in perspective.
Below, you’ll discover both the traditional and modern aspects of Turkish dating culture.
1. Families Can Be Matchmakers
In Turkish culture, mothers and aunts in Muslim conservative families play the role of a matchmaker. They research their friends and acquaintances to see if they have an appropriate match for their son. If they find a well-raised prospective bride, they convince him to meet her. This meeting is called “görücü usulü,” kind of like a blind date. If both parties like each other after a few dates, this matchmaking can result in marriage.
The majority of Gen Y and X have gone through an arranged marriage in Turkey; some of them end in happy marriages, some in divorces or unhappy marriages. Though this traditional matchmaking is not common today, there are still mothers who try to be matchmakers.
2. Tea Time Conversations Can Mean A Lot
Turkish people invite a person to drink tea (or coffee) if they want to get to know one another better. Turkish tea is the perfect companion for deep conversations and building bonds. So, if a Turkish person says “bir çay içelim,” which means “let’s drink a cup of tea,” it’s a sign that they’re trying to get to know you better, or they want to have a chat with you as a friend.
3. Public Displays Of Affection Can Be Frowned Upon
Since Turkey is a Muslim country, older people in Turkish society are not used to seeing couples hugging and kissing around. According to their opinion, displays of affection are private and can’t be performed in public. So, if you’re in a public place with older people around, try to be respectful.
On the other hand, younger people don’t care about it. It is not taboo or anything. Furthermore, foreigners displaying affection are tolerated since they may not know the cultural norms of a foreign country.
4. Online Dating Platforms
Dating apps are becoming more and more popular in Turkey these days. They’re mostly used by younger people who are looking for casual dating rather than a serious relationship. But there are some couples who met on a dating app and ended up getting married. So, it’s possible, too. However, if you’re meeting someone from a dating app, make sure to meet in crowded public places. Just to be on the safe side.
5. Taking It Slow On The First Date
The first date in Turkish culture is about getting to know one another and figuring out if you’re a good match, so both parties ask questions about each other’s life.
People take things slow in Turkey. They don’t try to get physical on the first date. They behave genuinely and respectfully. At the end of the first date, Turkish men usually pay the bill, even if there won’t be a second date. It’s a matter of hospitality and manhood for them.
For example, I met with my Turkish husband at a cafe on our first date. We drank lots of çay (tea) and ate dessert. Then he insisted on having dinner with me before he left for home (he was living in another city at that time), and I accepted. He paid for everything on that date and didn’t let me spend my money!
6. Meeting The Parents Is A Serious Thing
The early stages of a dating relationship are usually kept secret from the family in Turkish culture. That’s because young couples don’t want to include their families in their relationship if they can’t imagine a future together. However, if your Turkish boyfriend or girlfriend wants to introduce you to their family, it’s a sign that they imagine a future with you.
I remember my Turkish husband was wearing a chic double-breasted jacket when he came to meet my parents. He brought a box of chocolates and desserts. He was super respectful and confident when talking to my parents.
When it came to meeting his parents, I was wearing a clean and modest dress. I brought a flower in a pot as a gift to his mother. She still has it on her balcony!
Dating-Related Turkish Phrases
This blog post would be missing something if I didn’t teach you some Turkish phrases related to dating, right? These can be handy for you!
And if you want to learn more about them, you should try the Ling app, which is available on both the App Store and Play Store. Download it now, and don’t miss the free 7-day trial!
Final Words
You may find some cultural differences between Turkish dating culture and that of the Western world. If you’re dreaming about finding the one in Turkey, you better keep these tips in mind! Also, foreign women trying to win over a Turkish man’s heart might want to check out these tips for dating a Turkish man!
