Have you ever wished you could speak to your grandparents in their native tongue, understanding every word and nuance just as they do?
Learning Malay pronouns isn’t just about grammar—it’s about unlocking deeper conversations, honoring your cultural roots, and embracing the language that ties generations together.
Malay pronouns reflect the warmth, respect, and familial bonds embedded in the language. Whether you’re speaking formally with elders or casually with cousins, knowing how to navigate pronouns can make your conversations feel more natural and meaningful.
From the conventional saya (I) and awak (you) to the colloquial kitaorang (we) and diorang (they), mastering these words will bring you closer to fluency—and your family.
Let’s explore these essential Malay pronouns and how they bring the language—and your family stories—to life!
Table Of Contents
First-Person Malay Pronouns (I, We)
1. Saya (I) – Formal, Singular
Saya is the most commonly used pronoun for “I” in Malay, particularly in formal settings.
It conveys politeness, respect, and a sense of diplomacy, making it the ideal choice when speaking to elders, professionals, or strangers.
If you’re meeting your grandparents after many years, using saya shows humility and proper etiquette.
For example, if they ask about your life abroad, you might say:
Saya bekerja di luar negara, tetapi saya ingin belajar bahasa Melayu untuk berbual dengan nenek dan datuk.
(I work abroad, but I want to learn Malay to converse with grandma and grandpa.)
This pronoun is also widely used in traditional storytelling, prayers, and written correspondence, making it a fundamental part of your language-learning journey.
2. Aku (I) – Informal, Singular
Aku is the casual alternative to saya, often used in close-knit family relationships or between best friends.
Unlike saya, which creates a respectful distance, aku fosters warmth, intimacy, and emotional closeness.
In many families, younger siblings or cousins use aku when speaking among themselves, but it is generally avoided with elders unless there’s a strong bond.
If you’re reconnecting with a cousin from childhood, you might say:
Aku rindu zaman kita main di kampung dulu!
(I miss the times we played in the village!)
Using aku appropriately can make your conversations feel more natural and affectionate, but be mindful of whom you’re speaking to—some elders may find it too casual or even disrespectful.
3. The English ‘I’ – Colloquial, Singular
Many younger Malaysians casually insert the English pronoun “I” into Malay conversations, especially in urban settings or mixed-language households.
This blend of languages, known as Manglish, is common in families where younger generations speak more English than Malay.
If you’re reconnecting with younger relatives who are bilingual, don’t be surprised to hear:
I tak boleh datang hari ni sebab ada kerja.
(I can’t come today because I have work.)
While this style is informal, it’s a great way to ease into the language before fully transitioning to Malay pronouns.
4. Kami (We) – Formal, Exclusive, Plural
Kami is the plural first-person pronoun used when referring to “we” but excluding the listener. It’s a pronoun often heard in formal speech, storytelling, and traditional settings.
If your family is telling stories about their past, they may use kami to reflect on shared experiences that don’t include you:
Kami membesar di kampung sebelum berpindah ke bandar.
(We grew up in the village before moving to the city.)
For roots seekers, recognizing this pronoun is essential when listening to elders narrate family history.
5. Kita (We) – Polite, Inclusive, Plural
Kita, unlike kami, includes both the speaker and the listener, making it an inclusive form of “we.” It’s commonly used in warm, inviting conversations, particularly family discussions.
For instance, if your grandparents invite you to eat, they might say:
Jom, kita makan bersama-sama.
(Come, let us eat together.)
By using kita, they are including you in the experience, reinforcing a sense of togetherness.
6. Kitorang (We) – Colloquial, Plural
A more informal version of kita, kitorang is often used among younger Malaysians in conversational Malay phrases.
kitorang is a combination of kita “we” plus orang “people,” so it literally translates to “we people.” It’s a colloquial, laid-back way to refer to “we” in a group setting.
If your cousins are planning a family outing, they might say:
Kitorang nak pergi pantai hujung minggu ni. Jom ikut!
(We’re going to the beach this weekend. Come join us!)
Using kitorang helps you sound more natural in casual family interactions while still respecting formal pronoun distinctions.
| English | Malay | English Example | Malay Example |
|---|---|---|---|
| I (Formal, Singular) | Saya | I work abroad, but I want to learn Malay. | Saya bekerja di luar negara, tetapi saya ingin belajar bahasa Melayu. |
| I (Informal, Singular) | Aku | I miss the times we played in the village! | Aku rindu zaman kita main di kampung dulu! |
| I (Colloquial, Singular) | I | I can’t come today because I have work. | I tak boleh datang hari ni sebab ada kerja. |
| We (Formal, Exclusive) | Kami | We grew up in the village before moving to the city. | Kami membesar di kampung sebelum berpindah ke bandar. |
| We (Inclusive, Polite) | Kita | Come, let’s eat together. | Jom, kita makan bersama-sama. |
| We (Colloquial, Plural) | Kitorang | We’re going to the beach this weekend. Come join us! | Kitorang nak pergi pantai hujung minggu ni. Jom ikut! |
Second-Person Malay Pronouns (You, You all)
7. Awak (You) – Polite, Singular
Awak is one of the most commonly used second-person pronouns in Malay, and it strikes a balance between respect and warmth.
It’s a polite yet friendly way to speak with people in both formal and informal contexts, making it suitable for family conversations, casual encounters, and workplace settings.
If you’re looking to speak with your grandparents in a respectful yet comfortable manner, awak is the perfect pronoun to use. For example, when catching up with your grandmother, you might say:
Awak sihat tak, nenek?
(Are you well, grandma?)
This pronoun allows you to maintain a tone of politeness while also fostering a connection, reflecting the gentle warmth often shared between family members.
8. Kamu (You) – Formal, Singular
Kamu is more formal than awak, typically used when addressing someone younger in age or rank, like a student or someone you don’t have a close relationship with.
Teachers often use kamu to refer to their students in classroom settings. It also becomes plural when you say kamu semua (you all), making it versatile for both formal and group conversations.
For those reconnecting with family members—perhaps a distant cousin younger than you—kamu is an appropriate way to engage. For example, you might say:
Kamu ada cerita baru?
(Do you have any new stories?)
While kamu is mostly employed in formal contexts, some Malay speakers still use it with their close friends—and no harm is done!
9. Anda (You) – Highly Formal, Singular
Anda is the most formal version of “you” in Malay and is used to convey a high degree of respect.
It is commonly used in official settings such as business meetings, job interviews, or even in speeches.
While anda is not typically used in casual family settings, for completeness’ sake, here’s an example of how anda can be used in a wedding speech:
Saya ingin mengucapkan terima kasih kepada anda semua kerana hadir ke majlis ini.
(I would like to thank you all for attending this event.)
This usage helps convey a sense of reverence and honor during important occasions.
10. Kau (You) – Informal, Singular
Kau (often shortened from engkau) is an informal and casual pronoun used with close friends and family. It can feel personal and warm, making it ideal for those moments when you want to speak intimately with your closed younger siblings, cousins, or best friends.
However, it is considered rude if used with someone older or someone in authority, so it’s important to be mindful of context.
If you’re talking with younger siblings or a peer, kau is perfect for expressing closeness and affection. For example:
Kau nak makan apa hari ni, dik?
(What do you want to eat today, younger brother?)
Though kau can seem too casual for elders, using it in the right context can make your interactions feel more heartfelt and genuine, just like how your grandparents might have spoken with their own peers.
11. The English ‘You’ – Colloquial, Singular
In Malaysia, it’s common to hear the English pronoun you used in casual Malay conversations, especially among younger generations.
This reflects the influence of English in everyday life, particularly in urban settings or bilingual households.
It’s often used relaxed and informal, especially when speakers mix English and Malay (known as Manglish).
This allows for a more conversational tone without switching completely to Malay pronouns.
For example, when talking with a younger relative or friend, you might hear:
I dengar you akan pindah ke bandar next week.
I heard you are moving to the city next week.
Here, you is used directly as it would be in English, making the conversation feel natural and casual, especially if both speakers are comfortable with both languages.
This blend of languages can be a great stepping stone for language learners, helping them ease into more formal or traditional forms of address over time.
12. Kalian (You) – Formal, Plural
Kalian is the formal plural form of “you,” typically used when addressing a group of people in structured settings such as ceremonies, speeches, or official meetings.
While it is not commonly used in everyday conversations, it remains a respectful way to address multiple individuals in a dignified manner.
Although kalian is rarely used in family settings, here’s an example of how it might be used to invite distinguished guests to dinner:
Kalian dijemput untuk makan malam.
(You are all invited to dinner.)
This pronoun helps add an air of formality and respect when addressing a group in more official or ceremonial contexts.
| English | Malay | English Example | Malay Example |
|---|---|---|---|
| You (Polite, Singular) | Awak | Are you well, grandma? | Awak sihat tak, nenek? |
| You (Formal, Singular) | Kamu | Do you have any new stories? | Kamu ada cerita baru? |
| You (Highly Formal) | Anda | I would like to thank you all for attending this event. | Saya ingin mengucapkan terima kasih kepada anda semua kerana hadir ke majlis ini. |
| You (Informal, Singular) | Kau | What do you want to eat today, younger brother? | Kau nak makan apa hari ni, dik? |
| The English ‘You’ (Colloquial, Singular) | You | I heard you are moving to the city next week. | I dengar you akan pindah ke bandar next week. |
| You (Formal, Plural) | Kalian | You are all invited to dinner. | Kalian dijemput untuk makan malam. |
Third-Person Malay Pronouns (He, She, They, It)
13. Dia (He/She) – Polite, Singular
If you’re learning Malay to communicate with your grandparents, dia is one of the most essential pronouns to know.
Unlike English, Malay does not have gender-specific pronouns, so dia can refer to both “he” and “she.”
This makes it incredibly easy to use in conversations without needing to worry about gender distinctions.
For example, if your aunt is telling you a story about how she met your uncle, she might say:
Dia sangat baik kepada Mak Long sejak kami mula berkawan.
(He was very kind to me since we first became friends.)
The simplicity of dia also makes it a key part of everyday speech. You’ll hear it constantly whether you’re chatting with family, reading old letters, or watching Malaysian movies.
Embracing this pronoun will bring you one step closer to speaking the language fluently and naturally, just like your elders.
14. Beliau (He/She) – Formal, Singular
When referring to someone with high respect, such as an elder, community leader, or a person of authority, beliau is used instead of dia.
This pronoun carries a sense of reverence and is often seen in news reports, biographies, or speeches.
For example, if you’re talking about your grandfather’s contributions to the family, you might say:
Beliau telah membina rumah ini untuk keluarga kita.
(He built this house for our family.)
While beliau isn’t commonly used in casual family conversations, understanding its role in formal contexts will help you better appreciate how your grandparents speak about respected figures.
It also allows you to use a more polished form of Malay when needed, especially in cultural or historical discussions.
15. Ia (It) – Inanimate, Singular
Unlike dia and beliau, which refer to people, ia is used to refer to things, objects, or abstract concepts, and recently ia has been used to refer to animals.
However, it’s mostly found in written Malay rather than in daily speech.
Suppose you’re reading a traditional Malay folktale or an old family document.
In that case, you might come across ia being used instead of itu or ini (which are more commonly used in spoken Malay).
For example, your grandma might say:
Ia suka main dekat halaman rumah, tiap kali nenek panggil, ia terus lari datang.
(It loves playing in the yard; every time Grandma calls, it runs over right away.)
Though you might not use ia much in conversation, recognizing it in written texts will help you better understand older Malay literature and historical documents, giving you deeper insight into your cultural heritage.
16. Mereka (They) – Polite, Plural
Mereka is the standard way to say “they” in Malay and is used in both formal and informal contexts.
It’s a great pronoun to know if you want to talk about your family members collectively, such as when sharing memories about your ancestors.
For example, if you’re reminiscing with your grandparents, you might say:
Mereka selalu berkumpul setiap petang untuk berbual dan minum teh.
(They always gathered every evening to chat and drink tea.)
While mereka is widely understood and respected, it may sound slightly formal in casual speech.
If you’re speaking with younger family members, they may prefer a more colloquial alternative.
17. Diorang (They) – Colloquial, Plural
A more informal version of mereka, diorang is commonly used in everyday conversations.
It combines dia (he/she) and orang (people), making it a more natural-sounding choice in casual settings.
If you’re chatting with cousins or siblings, you might hear:
Diorang nak pergi pasar malam malam ni, jom ikut!
(They want to go to the night market tonight, let’s go!)
With diorang, you can make phrases that make you sound more Malay.
It makes your interactions feel more natural.
While mereka is still important for formal occasions, diorang is what you’ll likely hear in daily conversations among family and friends.
| English | Malay | English Example | Malay Example |
|---|---|---|---|
| He/She (Polite, Singular) | Dia | He was very kind to me since we first became friends. | Dia sangat baik kepada Mak Long sejak kami mula berkawan. |
| He/She (Formal, Singular) | Beliau | He built this house for our family. | Beliau telah membina rumah ini untuk keluarga kita. |
| It (Inanimate, Singular) | Ia | It loves playing in the yard; every time Grandma calls, it runs over right away. | Ia suka main dekat halaman rumah, tiap kali nenek panggil, ia terus lari datang. |
| They (Polite, Singular) | Mereka | They always gathered every evening to chat and drink tea. | Mereka selalu berkumpul setiap petang untuk berbual dan minum teh. |
| They (Colloquial, Plural) | Diorang | They want to go to the night market tonight, let’s go! | Diorang nak pergi pasar malam malam ni, jom ikut! |
Tips: How And When To Use These 17 Malay Pronouns
Mastering Malay pronouns is not just about grammar—it’s about reconnecting with your roots, showing respect, and deepening your bond with your family.
Here’s how you can use them naturally and confidently when speaking with your grandparents and elders:
1. Choose Between Using a Pronoun or a Family Title
Observe how your relatives address each other and follow suit. In Malay, referring to people by their family titles is common instead of using pronouns.
This practice shows respect and reinforces family connections.
For example, instead of asking “Have you eaten?” with awak (you), it’s more natural and respectful to say:
- Nenek dah makan? (Has grandma eaten?)
Similarly, when speaking about yourself to an elder, replace “I” with your name:
- Aisha dah makan. (Aisha has eaten.)
Fun fact: This approach is similar to how Korean and Thai avoid direct pronouns in family interactions. If you’re unsure, using titles like Nenek (grandmother) or Pakcik (uncle) will always be the safest choice.
2. Pick the Right Pronoun Based on Status, Age, and Relationship
Match your pronoun choice with the level of formality required. Using the wrong pronoun might sound too casual or overly distant.
Here’s a comprehensive table to help you choose the right pronoun for any social situation.
Whether you’re speaking to elders, distant relatives, or close family members, it will empower you to communicate naturally while honoring your heritage and cultural roots!
| No. | English | Malay | To Respected People | To Older Relatives | To Distant Younger Relatives & Friends | To Close Younger Relatives & Friends |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | I (formal) | Saya | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ❌ No (Too formal) |
| 2 | I (informal) | Aku | ❌ No | ❌ No | ❌ No | ✅ Yes |
| 3 | I (colloquial) | I (English) | ❌ No | ❌ No | ✅ Yes (Urban settings) | ✅ Yes (Urban settings) |
| 4 | We (exclusive) | Kami | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ❌ No (Too formal) |
| 5 | We (inclusive) | Kita | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes |
| 6 | We (colloquial) | Kitorang | ❌ No | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes |
| 7 | You (polite) | Awak | ❌ No | ✅ Yes (if familiar) | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes |
| 8 | You (formal) | Kamu | ❌ No | ❌ No | ✅ Yes | ❌ No (Too formal) |
| 9 | You (highly formal) | Anda | ✅ Yes | ❌ No | ❌ No | ❌ No |
| 10 | You (informal) | Kau | ❌ No | ❌ No | ❌ No | ✅ Yes |
| 11 | You (colloquial) | You (English) | ❌ No | ❌ No | ✅ Yes (Urban settings) | ✅ Yes (Urban settings) |
| 12 | You all (formal) | Kalian | ✅ Yes | ❌ No | ❌ No (Too formal) | ❌ No (Too formal) |
| 13 | He/She (polite) | Dia | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes |
| 14 | He/She (formal) | Beliau | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes (Very formal) | ❌ No | ❌ No |
| 15 | It (inanimate) | Ia | ❌ No | ❌ No | ❌ No | ❌ No |
| 16 | They (polite) | Mereka | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ❌ No (Too formal) |
| 17 | They (colloquial) | Diorang | ❌ No | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes | ✅ Yes |
3. When in Doubt, Use These Safe Pronouns
Stick to the safest default pronouns if you’re unsure.
If you can’t remember a relative’s title or are unsure which pronoun to use, follow this golden rule:
- Use Saya for “I” (formal and respectful).
- Use Awak for “You” (neutral and widely accepted).
- Use Dia for “He/She” (universal and safe).
For example, if you’re unsure about how to address an aunt or uncle, you can say:
Saya gembira dapat jumpa awak dan keluarga.
(I am happy to meet you and your family.)
This approach ensures politeness while minimizing the risk of using overly casual or incorrect pronouns.
While mastering these pronouns may seem challenging initially, consistent practice will make them second nature.
The Ling app is a great starting point, helping you navigate which pronouns to use when communicating with different family members!
How Do You Say Pronouns In Malay?
In Malay, pronouns are called kata ganti nama, which literally means “words that replace names.”
They are essential for building connections and expressing respect in family interactions.
For example, awak is a common way to say “you” in polite conversations, while kau is more casual and used among close friends.
For third-person references, dia means “he” or “she” without specifying gender, while mereka refers to “they.”
Choosing the right pronoun helps maintain warmth and cultural respect in conversations with relatives.
The Ling app makes learning these pronouns engaging, helping you confidently communicate and deepen your connection to your heritage.
Frequently Asked Questions For Malay Pronouns
What Are The First-Person Pronouns In Malay?
In Malay, first-person pronouns vary based on formality and speaker relationships.
Saya is the most common and polite way to say “I,” often used in formal settings and when speaking to elders.
On the other hand, aku is a more intimate and informal pronoun, typically used among close friends and family.
For “we,” kami is exclusive (excluding the listener), while kita is inclusive (including the listener).
In casual, everyday speech, younger Malaysians also use kitorang, a colloquial alternative to kami and kita.
Understanding these distinctions allows you to communicate naturally and respectfully with your loved ones.
What Is The Difference Between Kami And Kita?
While both kami and kita translate to “we,” the difference lies in who is included.
Kami refers to “we” but excludes the listener, whereas kita is inclusive and involves the person being spoken to.
This distinction is crucial in formal writing or structured conversations. However, in everyday spoken Malay, many speakers blur the difference and simply use kita in all situations.
If you’re chatting with family in a relaxed setting, using kita will sound more natural.
The Ling app provides real-world dialogue simulations, helping you grasp when to use each term and sound more like a native speaker.
What Is A Possessive Pronoun In Malay?
In Malay, possessive pronouns belong to the category of kata ganti milik, which indicates ownership or possession.
While English and Chinese have clear possessive pronouns such as “my,” “your,” or “their,” which precede the noun, Malay has a different way of expressing possession in formal structures.
In standard Malay, the possessive marker typically comes after the noun.
For example, buku saya (literally “book I”) means “my book,” and rumah mereka (“house they”) means “their house.”
However, in colloquial spoken Malay, many speakers use a structure that mirrors English and Chinese, influenced by the language contact in Malaysia.
This structure places the pronoun first, followed by punya (the possessive marker), and then the noun.
This is similar to the possessive construction in English—John (possessor) + ‘s (possessive marker) + book (possessed) or Mandarin Chinese—我 wǒ ‘I’ (possessor) + 的 de ‘-s'(possessive marker) + 书 shū ‘book’ (possessed).
So, instead of buku saya for “my book,” speakers may say saya punya buku, and instead of rumah mereka for “their house,” they might say mereka punya rumah.
Use These Malay Pronouns With Your Loved Ones Now!
Mastering Malay pronouns is a powerful way to reconnect with your family’s roots.
By understanding First-Person Malay Pronouns (I, We), like saya for formal situations or kitorang for casual chats, you’ll be able to address yourself appropriately to different family members.
Knowing Second-Person Malay Pronouns (You, You All) such as awak for polite conversations or kalian when addressing multiple family members helps in maintaining respect.
With Third-Person Malay Pronouns (He, She, They, It) like dia for close family and beliau for elders, you can honor those who came before you.
And with Tips: How And When To Use These 17 Malay Pronouns, you’ll have a complete guide to speak easily, bridging generations and preserving your family’s language.
Embrace these tools, and learning Malay won’t just be easier—it will help you create lasting bonds with your heritage!
Step Up Your Malay Language Game!
Learning Malay pronouns is more than just memorizing words—it’s about reconnecting with your roots and strengthening bonds with your family.
By mastering these essential pronouns, you’ll be able to speak with your grandparents and loved ones in a way that honors your heritage and traditions.
Learn Malaysian and rediscover the beauty of your language as you embrace your roots and create lasting memories with Ling as your trusted companion!
